By Diane Lang

We have been discussing work-life balance on the news a lot lately due to the Yahoo and Best Buy news of “no-more” working from home and how that affects moms and others who work from home. Psychotherapist, author and positive living speaker, Diane Lang, offers two main tips for moms who may be feeling stressed and pressured due to the telecommuting change or any change in their work-life balance.. Lang advises to make our goal to feel balanced by being healthy and happy. This way when stressful situations come our way (and they will frequently) we can handle them with grace and resiliency. If we are optimistic in general then we can handle stress quicker and be more resilient about it.

“My question is: why do we even try for the unrealistic expectation that we could have it all? That statement alone is stressful. Just trying to reach that expectation sets us up for failure. We only have a certain amount of hours in a day with a lot of tasks and responsibilities. I feel that instead of making that a goal for women that we should remove it from the table and remove some of the stress that comes with it,” shares Lang, the author of two books, Baby Steps: The Path from Motherhood to Career and more recently, Creating Balance and Finding Happiness.

We need to remember that everyone had a different definition of happiness, success and balance. So, what might be a great work-life balance for one won’t be for the other? The truth is something will not get as much attention as the other. It’s the choice of the woman but not everything can get a 100% attention all the time and when we try to strive for that we end up putting ourselves last and getting sick both physically and emotionally even hitting burnout. If we have burnout then did we really have it all?

Instead try making a priority list and including yourself on it. Actually not just on the list but number 1 on the list. You can’t have a good life and be a great mom/employee if you’re not healthy both emotionally and physically. It’s impossible so why try for that. Don’t self-sabotage your dreams by forgetting to put yourself in them. Balance isn’t just about juggling time and schedule. Balance is keeping yourself healthy and happy.

Two things we need to do to stay balanced:

1. Are your basic needs met? We are what we eat, how much we sleep, the water we drink and exercise.

2. Reduce stress — we can’t live a stress free life so again don’t try instead work on reducing stress with activities like meditation, yoga, breathing techniques, gratitude, spending time in nature, music, time with friends and exercise.

Let’s make our goal to feel balanced by being healthy and happy. This way when stressful situations come our way (and they will frequently) we can handle them with grace and resiliency. If we are optimistic in general then we can handle stress quicker and be more resilient about it.

– Diane Lang is a Positive Living Expert and psychotherapist – is a nationally recognized speaker, author, educator, therapist and media expert. Lang is extremely mediagenic and offers expertise on a variety of health and wellness topics about creating balance and finding happiness through positive living as well as multiple mental health, lifestyle and parenting needs. In addition to holding multiple counseling positions, Diane is also an adjunct professor at Montclair State University.