What Truly Matters

Share Button

By Diane Lang

girlhatThis article is to make sure you add what really matters into your daily life.

What matters

1. Connection – we need others. No matter what anyone says we can’t be happy alone,we need to have connection. The quantity of people is up to you but for happiness purposes you need to have people you connect with and feel a sense of belonging. The number one factor for happiness is socialization.

2. Religion/Spirituality matter – as I pursued my academic career in psychology, there wasn’t much talk about either but when I became a student of positive psychology I learned how important it was to have a sense of a higher power, to know there is something bigger out there. It doesn’t matter if you find it in religion or spirituality just finding it is important. The other part is through religion/spirituality you find connection and community.

3. You can’t feel happiness without being vulnerable. If your not open to the possibilities, the chance of being hurt, Then your not fully available to feel happiness.

4. The roller coaster ride of happiness – so if we know we have to be vulnerable to find true happiness then we also know that happiness isn’t a smooth ride. It will have its ups and downs. Everything is temporary. So, if its good time enjoy it, if its a bad time learn from it.

5. If we hold in our emotions, not let people know our true self we end up in a vicious cycle. The more we hide, the more the negativity keeps rearing its ugly head. You can’t move forward till you come face to face with your emotions, fear and your authentic self.

6. If you don’t believe in yourself you will always be searching for love and acceptance. It will be a never ending search that will include pain and suffering. You must find self-love before anything else.

To do this, we must be self compassionate, kind and patient to ourselves.

7. I realized I spent a majority of my life being someone else. I was a person who deep down inside was afraid of her own shadow. A person who never reveled how she felt due to fear of rejection.All this got me was pain, suffering and more fear. To have satisfying relationships you must be you, the authentic you, the imperfect you, the silly and goofy you, the whole package. There is no half fasts, and’s, if’s or buts on this one. Your either fully in or not. When you let the true you shine and let go of the false self, your shoulders will relax, the brick will be lifted from your chest and life will flow more smoothly. It is an easier ride to be you.

8. Stepping outside your comfort zone will cause you to be vulnerable. Start small. Take these vulnerable steps towards an authentic life. Small steps of courage are all that is needed. Open up a little more, share a little bit of you, give a compliment to a stranger, try something new, be honest, start somewhere.

Being vulnerable, stepping outside your comfort zone and being the true you is all an investment in your overall life satisfaction. It is an investment in your happiness, When you invest in yourself everyone around you reaps the benefits. It is important to realize self-care is an investment in you and many others. Your happiness/moods are contagious When your happy others around you feel warm, happy and comfortable.

– For more information please visit Diane’s website: www.dlcounseling.com or email Diane: [email protected]