By Diane Lang

Success is definitely a term that could have many meanings. According to Dictionary.com: Success is the favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors; the accomplishment of one’s goals.

I agree with this definition. But what makes defining success tough is that everyone’s goals and endeavors are different.

I have interviewed many people and have seen success be defined by:

– Being the best parent they could be.

– Being wealthy and/or powerful at one’s job.

– Finishing a college degree, post-secondary degree or getting a high school diploma or GED.

– How much money is one’s bank?

– Having a successful long term marriage/relationship.

– How many people’s lives you touched and helped.

– The car one drives, the house they live in and all the toys/luxuries one has.

The list could go on and on but as you see it’s different for everyone. But what I have learned is that there are a few different traits that all success people have. When we adopt these traits into our lives our success rate goes up. The good news – all of these traits are learned so yes everyone can learn and adopt them into their own personal life, if they choose. The key word is choose. If you choose to be successful, believe it or not some people don’t.

Traits that cause success

1. Risk takers – even though everyone’s definition of success is different, all people who define themselves as successful have taken risks. They have all jumped out of their comfort zones and tried something new.

2. Fear – all success people feel fear. They are aware of fear and use it as a motivator instead of an emotion that causes them to feel stuck and stagnate,

3. Growth – all success people are constantly learning both professionally and personally. Whether it’s through classes, school, workshops, mentors, internships, etc. The how or what doesn’t matter. It’s just that they always strive to grow, develop and learn.

4. Persistence – the need to keep moving forward even when things aren’t going your way. The need to continue when things are slow or you keep hearing the word “no” over and over again.

5. Optimism – all successful people are optimistic and resilient. Through optimism we develop resiliency. It’s seeing the positive side of things. The glass half full not empty. Its choosing the perspective of everything that is bad is temporary. Its choosing to know what goes down will come up!

6. Belief – it’s a total belief in whatever your goals are. It’s a total belief in you. It’s a belief that what you are doing is your purpose. A lot of success people will say they have blinders on. Even when they hear No they continue on because they have a case of the “beliefs”.

7. Passion – it’s a complete passion, love and interest in whatever you’re doing. You’re so completely involved in your goal that you’re in “Flow”. It doesn’t matter what else is going on, you’re just so involved in your goal/activity that you keep doing it.

8. They work on what they CAN control not what they CAN’T. They focus on the can and take action. They set up goals that are realistic and attainable.

9. They live in the now. They use their past as a teachable/learnable moment. They plan for their future but then let it go because they have no control over it and they focus on the NOW!

10. They work on their thought process as well as everything else. A successful person knows they need to think they can be successful in order to succeed. They know their thoughts produce their actions. So, what are you thinking about yourself/ goals?

– Diane Lang is a therapist, author, and positive psychology educator Diane Lang. Ms. Lang is the author of “Baby Steps: the Path from Motherhood to Career” and “Creating Balance & Finding Happiness.” She has been featured in many publications and shows, including the Daily Record, Family Beautiful Magazine, Health & Beauty NJ, Family and Working Mother Magazine, Good Morning Connecticut, and Fox & Friends. She has counseled patients with different forms of mental illness, physical and emotional abuse, and relationship issues, and is a much-sought-after expert for positive parenting.